Attention!

“Take care of the minutes and the years will take care of themselves.”

I want my attention back. I’m not sure where it went, but I do not recall ever being this distracted. In my leadership class, we teach time management and force students to perform a four-quadrant analysis of how they spend their days. I make fun of them for wasting so much time on pointless activities like scrolling social media and playing video games. It is way past time for me to reflect on this question for myself.

If I compare my habits to what I believe to be normal and average, I feel pretty good. I do not watch TV. I do not consume content on social media. I’m a sports fan, but I just pay attention to the standings rather than watch hours of games. I couldn’t tell you who started for the Astros last night, or quote any of the stats from the latest Saints game.

Where then does all the time go? If I look at the screen time calculator on my phone, it tells me that I spend a reasonable amount of each day reading the New York Times and Substack newsletters, responding to email, and doing the daily NYT games. I guess you would consider completing the crossword on a daily basis to be a waste of time, but it is an enjoyable activity that takes my mind off other things right before I go to bed. I also listen to podcasts, but only in the car or at the gym, so they don't interfere with my ability to get more important things done.

If I am not spending an inordinate amount of time on trivial things, then why do I feel so distracted and overwhelmed? Something needs to change so I can create the capacity to read for pleasure or pursue other more fulfilling activities like spending time with friends.

I think the answer is that I need to make myself less open to interruptions. Answering phone calls, responding to texts and emails, and jumping at every Teams notification eats away at my ability to focus on a task. I need to use the “Do Not Disturb” function for a few hours each day so that I can get my work done. There is a great cost to being always online. It is efficient in the short term, but it kills my personal productivity.  

We’ll see if there is a way to claw back some of that time and attention that seems to have been lost somewhere along the way. It is the one thing I desperately want to fix in life.

Now that I am done writing this, I have to get back to my email. Sad.