Dad's Day

Being a parent is great training for being a grandparent. If only there were a way to learn from all those mistakes without having to make them. I’m sure that my children would be much better off if I had them now, when I am older and wiser. My grandmother told me that all children come with their own little instruction books, but Granny was full of these unhelpful aphorisms. I had no idea what to do, and I never found the instruction manual.

We used to joke that we had two savings funds: one for our kids’ college and one for their therapy. Now that they are all adults with advanced degrees, it is probably past time to dip into the second fund. I hope that we just messed up our kids in normal ways. We wouldn’t want them to become case studies in some graduate-level psychology textbook. Anyway, the fact that they still call me on Father’s Day is a good sign that it isn’t all that bad (and when I say “call” I assume that you all know that means I get a text message. Let’s not engage in crazy talk.)

Last year, I wrote a post with some advice for my children. This year, I am going to focus on the grandchildren because, let’s be honest, they’re a lot more fun. Depending on how you count them, I have either two, four, or forty grandchildren. We have fully embraced the Hawaiian concept of hanai, and the list of informally adopted grandkids is long. I love them all, and it is the joy of my life to see them grow and blast through each milestone.

Maya took her first steps a couple of weeks ago. Eli finished his first year of preschool. Marshall’s “Odyssey of the Mind” team went to the world championships, and he will be joining Walker in middle school next year. Harlee has learned to say, “Bully” in a way that you can almost understand. Addison still comes running to me. Ellie and Bear learned to snowboard this winter. Beckham and Georgie Mae like to play. And I had the opportunity to feed perfect little Wyatt his first barbecue brisket this spring. He liked it. These kids are amazing. They all call me “Bully”, or at least the ones that can talk.

My advice to fathers and grandfathers is to give your kids and grandkids the gift of your attention. It is the most valuable thing you have to offer them, and they will remember it forever. To the kids out there, remember that device in your hand can also be used for making an actual old-fashioned telephone call, or better yet, FaceTime your dad.