Entitlement vs Gratitude

I’ve written before about dispositional gratitude and its effect on your happiness and general state of mind. As we prepare for the Thanksgiving season, it is an excellent time to remember and reflect on all the things for which we should be grateful. While this annual tradition is a positive thing, the feelings can be fleeting if we don’t develop a gracious attitude that permeates our day-to-day lives.

To highlight the benefits of dispositional gratitude, let's look at its opposite – entitlement. The entitlement attitude stems from the belief that we deserve certain privileges without having to earn them. People with this mindset often focus on what they lack or what they believe is "owed" to them. I can’t say that this attitude is more prevalent today than in times past, but I encounter it all the time. I suspect that social media and comparison culture play a role in entitlement thinking. We tend to compare ourselves to those who have the things we want. We rarely compare ourselves to those who are less fortunate. The law of large numbers tells us that someone in your social feed is always going to be on a fantastic vacation, having a great time, or showing off some shiny new thing.

Entitlement frequently leads to frustration and dissatisfaction that can strain relationships as they suffer under the weight of unmet expectations. Good for you if you are looking to improve your circumstances and are taking proactive steps to do so. I hope that you succeed in getting what you want. What I am suggesting here is that you recognize and appreciate what you already have. Your current happiness is not a function of your station in life; it is determined by your perspective.

The contrast between these two attitudes highlights a fundamental choice in how we approach life. While entitlement often leads to frustration and disappointment, gratitude cultivates contentment and joy. Adopting a grateful mindset can be as simple as pausing daily to reflect on what’s good in life, whether it’s a supportive friend, a personal achievement, or even a sunny day. In a world where we’re often encouraged to want more, choosing gratitude over entitlement can transform our perspective, leading to a richer, more fulfilling life.