Sincerity

My uncle Joe passed away in December after a brief illness. He was 81. Uncle Jodie has been the patriarch of the family for the past thirty years. We share a name and a bond that is stronger than most uncle-nephew relationships. His ex-brother-in-law offered a eulogy at his funeral. (The fact that his ex-brother-in-law was eulogizing him is a whole ‘nother story about my family.)

Uncle Bubba, the Catholic priest, said that when he thought of Jodie the word “sincere” came to mind. He then went on and told a (linguistically disputed) story about the root of the word sincere.

He told us that in ancient Rome vendors of marble statues would hide imperfections in the sculptures by mixing marble dust with wax (cere) and using it to smooth over chips and cracks, thereby increasing the value of the piece. A smart buyer would ask for a sculpture without (sin) wax.

Thus “sin cere” meant without wax to cover up the imperfections. That was certainly my Uncle Jodie. He was a man in full, on display as his sincere self. It is impossible for me to imagine a scenario where he was playing a part, attempting to manipulate, or being the slightest bit dishonest.

If you read my New Year’s post, you know that my resolution is to openly live my life according to my values; to be my authentic self. Here I am with all my flaws on display. You may accomplish great things, but the virtues that are highlighted in your eulogy are the ones that matter. I would be thrilled to have others say that I presented myself to the world at all times “without wax”.  Aloha ‘oe Uncle Joe.